Survivor

I just read my last post. How sad! I am feeling better now.

After surviving the H1N1 I am back at work today. I am super tired but the fever is gone so I am clear (let’s hope). Although I haven’t eaten that much during this past week, I’ve eaten bad stuff a.k.a cheese, candies, pasta and bread. They have crept upon me when I was weak but now it’s time to get rid of them. Again.

I haven’t done anything last week so I don’t have much to say. As I said, I wasn’t able to get to my ultimate goal for November 4 (2nd Couple Anniversary w/ M) but I went down to 120.

It was M sister’s birthday party yesterday and I had bread, potatoes AND cake so I am pretty sure 120 is down the toilet but that’s okay. Our journey is filled with setbacks and we struggle with the same 10 pounds most of the time. I’ll get there though. As sure as I am alive; I will get there.

It will be a year since I have started dieting/restricting. A whole year of this. I am still very dissatisfied by my body but I think I will never be at peace with myself upon this point. But I can be happy with others things and create a whole acceptable.

My new goal date is December 25 for obvious reasons. Still the same weight goal. I only have 4 pounds or so to lose, but they are the hardest. I need to force my body into the underweight world because clearly, it does not want to get there willingly.

I don’t have much of a plan. It’s always the same things. Eat less. Exercise more. Cleanse. Detoxicate. Record calories. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. And it probably won’t be any different either. I need a tight schedule and give myself next to no free time.

I am keeping the Right Size Operation going. I am trying to give a try at a no-nonsense plan, just to see where that goes.

Also, I want to comment more on your blogs. I have so much support here and although I read every post of blog I follow, I don’t share the love enough. So be prepared to hear from me.

Lots of love,
L.